NOT drinking in the club.. DHV?

Tripp said something in another post about not drinking in the club... I just wanted to add my $0.02 from what I've noticed...

I used to think that my game was so much better after a few drinks in a club.. Not the case. It just seems easier to open, kino, escalate, close, etc in the club because THEY are drinking. My game is definitely better sober.

About being sober in the club... People forget that in jr high and HS, you went to dances, proms, and other social events and had a blast, talked to girls, hooked up, etc while being dead sober. Nowadays, people feel like they need alcohol as a social lubricant crutch. I think it's all in your head. In fact, there are videos of college parties where non-alcoholic beer replaced normal beer-- people- guys, girls, acting crazy, socializing, acting drunk... yet, their BAC was a flat 0.000 Interesting social experiment, no?

As for drinking and DHV/DLV... here are my thoughts..
At least where I live (alcohol served 24hrs), the vast, VAST majority of the people in the club are drinking SOME, if not en route to getting completely schnokkered. Remember how in HS you were a square if you showed up to a party and never drank? I think it is the opposite now! When you go to a club dead sober and walk up to a set with a water bottle in your hands, I think it is a DHV.. Here's why-- It's called "liquid confidence" for a reason. Most guys approach few sets as it is and would approach even fewer if they weren't drunk. It's because they lack confidence. Chicks dig confidence, however, all guys are confident when drunk. When a guy who has been drinking opens a set, the girl will wonder if you would have the balls to walk up to her in the mall. Being sober is cool because it tells the girl that you are such a fun person, you don't need alcohol to have a great time because you are uninhibited as it is. You open, touch, tell jokes without the buzz. It also tells her that your confidence is genuine , and that you are not one of those guys who gets drunk and looks for one-night stands with anyone. You are different; you are selective.

When the girl asks you why you are not drinking, you can use this in a number of different ways to DHV, such as:

You're the leader of your group, and it is your job to look out for everyone else, or, you could use it to tell her a little about your self...
For instance, on Nip Tuck, plastic surgeon, Christian (a player and natural PUA) was at this bar trying to talk to this girl. She asked him why he is not drinking. He says "because I have surgery tomorrow." Eventually he tells her he is a plastic surgeon, and she creams her panties. (If you're going to use this in this manner because you want to tell her you have a fight tomorrow, or a house to sell, or a business meeting to host, etc, you ARE bragging, so I suggest you still make her work for it before you tell her, otherwise it will come across like you're fishing for reason to brag to her.

Aside, I would avoid telling her reasons for not drinking such as:
Because it is against your religion or because of a health condition. You want her to know that it is you're choice for not drinking, and that you are not simply doing it because you -have- to.

You guys agree with this?

I never drink wherever I go to any event unless I'm thirsty, then I may drink a chick drink that tastes good. It's one of the things most people remember about my character... along with that I never swear. It's always seems to be perceived by others that I live by my own rules and not what the group decides. And yes, not drinking takes confidence; most fold to the peer pressure.

I agree with alot of what both of you said. I think you have many valid points as to why a girl would view you not drinking as a DHV, its all very logical...however i think it will really differ from girl to girl. I think its more important what you say when they bring it up.

My favorite thing to say, and it seems to work well is this "I dont feel like it, i dont have to drink to have fun, do you?"

This doesnt come accross as you trying to validate or excuse yourself for not drinking, and it challenges them. Most likely they know the situation is a bit pathetic (like you said you do not have to drink to have fun at all), and when you challenge them in this way they have to then validate thier reasons for drinking to you...and now they cant use the primary excuse they use to convince themselves to do it.

When i go out i decide based on how i feel then if im gonna drink at all, if i do i keep it clean, i get buzed and i usually do it to help relax a bit and when im just gonna socialize with close friends. If im not drinking ill order seltzer water...and if anyone asks what it is i say its seltzer water as if its not a big deal, bc its not (plus this is a much cheaper alternative ).

All drinking accomplishes is to lower your self imposed shields, temporarily. Its much more important to learn to deal with those limitations and try to overcome them...in the long run it will make all the difference.

Getting shit faced may make you feel more social and may get you some attention...but its short lived and the attention isnt the kind you want. Watching a drunkard is alot like watching the circus...its interesting for a few mins, gets boring after a while, and the next day its insignificant and forgettable (for all you circus lovers out there i have seen dive circus acts all the way up to the best ones...still fits my analogy). You dont want to be remebered, or worse yet forgotten, as the drunk who couldnt control themselves or the guy whos only fun when hes drunk.

I used to be that dummy who got trashed every time, so when i tell people im not drinking its all that much more of a surprise to them...and since they want to be entertained they push for me to drink....however i stand firm and show them i can be fun and social even more sober then when im drunk. Thier perception of you changes for the better.

Good post.

Diesel, confidence is indeed a qualifier to many girls. Personally, I've chosen not to drink that decision occured when I was a teenager. Whenever I'm out, girls wonder why my brothers and I don't drink and we tell them, personal choice. Our parents never drank, so we picked up that habit, simple. Diesel,Hobbit, and Ka you made excellent points. peace,lvoe and succe SS

I want to expand on something Ka said.

I've been out with more than one DIFFERENT group that had the same shocks and responses to MY not drinking. Without fail they are totally shocked that I am myself without drinking and am getting down and having fun and all of that stuff, which they can't seem to do without the liquid courage.

It also never fails that AFTER that night SOMEONE makes the comment that I'm so fucking cool because I'm laid back, loose, whatever word or phrase they want to use, because I'm having a blast and NOT drinking in order to have that blast. Which inevitably leads to them saying they want to hang out again.

I am the guy that can talk to any guy or girl and get them to laugh or whatever and can get down and dance and can socialize with DIFFERENT groups other than my own . . . all without a single drop of alcohol. It comes to a total shock to most people.

I've even had them make comments on the spot while we are at the club, in shock, that I haven't drank all night.

So yeah, definitely DHV.

Interesting post guys. There's nothing wrong with enjoying a drink but knowing your limits is vital. I'm gonna try clubbing today without drinking, well maybe just the one. I love the point about it all being in the mind though.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=bPM0BkMSZCU

Darren Brown is hilarious. The guy drunk in the library

randy1random wrote:

Interesting post guys. There's nothing wrong with enjoying a drink but knowing your limits is vital. I'm gonna try clubbing today without drinking, well maybe just the one. I love the point about it all being in the mind though.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=bPM0BkMSZCU

I did kinda well, I only bought one drink all night and K-closed one girl whilst still stone sober, but I got bought 2 drinks and won 2 bottles of champaine playing ruelette. But that's pretty sober for me.

You kiss closed one girl while stone sober. AWESOME!

Next thing you know, you'll be . . . while sober