I need some advice. Scold me if you must.

First off, I am an 18 year old guy awaiting to go to the army soon as it is complusory in my country. And after seeing mystery's life I really wanted to change mine, so I would stack myself up with his method everyday for a period of time.

I was really hardly in a relationship even though I am with reference to my friends a pretty boy, and in addition I am in a small asian country where the females NEVER make the first move and the guys are too chicken shit to even talk to one.

My fear of asking girls came from my first approach when I was 14 when I tried to talk to the girl of my dreams then but she completely ignored me as she too was extremely introverted. Despite that, I had pobia of girls I'm attracted to since. Pathetic I know.

But after seeing mystery I was tenious to change my life, I dressed to appear more prominent in a crowd and developed my inner game sense. Problem was, my close friends hate the club scene( 18 is the legal age in my country) and I can only practice out in malls or what people call "day game". Now I knew day game was a hard one to start with but I went with it anyway. I mustered the courage to talk to girls when out with my friends who seemed so impressed but my bravery.

However, I studied in Canada and wasn't very good in chinese, so some approaches went dry quick, I also learned that indirect openers are not good to use in day game. I was never successful, but I kept going on. After 3 approaches I suddenly stopped. My friends started school and I have no one to hang out with. For the past week I have been at home rotting away, feeling absolutely useless. I thought of going out on my own, but going to clubs alone at such a young age seems weirddd.

Please some advice! Scold me and rant at me if you must I really need help!

Hey man. Welcome to the forum first of all.

Second, it's funny that you say day game is hard to start with. Most guys feel club game is hard to start with.

Anyway, at the point you are, perseverance will make a big difference. I personally started clubbing on my own and continued that way for months. Yes, it's hard, but it can be done.

One step for you right now would be to make friends with some guys to build a bit of social proof. Along the way, make FRIENDS with girls to build some pre-selection.

How much of Mystery's stuff have you watched or learned? Do you know about teasing? About the attraction switches?

Go out alone, you are NOT the sum of the people you hang out with. Go out, make friends who do like going out to clubs, and then you'll have people to go out to clubs with.

You are going into the army, where excuse me but you could get fucking shot, and your afraid to goto a club one night alone bc its "weird"?

You sound like your mind is leaning the right way, now give it the push it needs. Also keep doing day game, there is nothing wrong with going out to lunch yourself and opening then, or going shopping and opening everyone in the supermarket.

You sound like you've made alot of progress already, why let it stop now? You can't sit at home all alone wasteing away. Think about how bad it feels to sit around doing nothing and push yourself to dress nice, get out, and open.

/end rant

Ka wrote:

Go out alone, you are NOT the sum of the people you hang out with. Go out, make friends who do like going out to clubs, and then you'll have people to go out to clubs with.

You are going into the army, where excuse me but you could get fucking shot, and your afraid to goto a club one night alone bc its "weird"?

You sound like your mind is leaning the right way, now give it the push it needs. Also keep doing day game, there is nothing wrong with going out to lunch yourself and opening then, or going shopping and opening everyone in the supermarket.

You sound like you've made alot of progress already, why let it stop now? You can't sit at home all alone wasteing away. Think about how bad it feels to sit around doing nothing and push yourself to dress nice, get out, and open.

/end rant

Agreed! I echo what L.A. Tripp and Ka have said here at the highest level my voice can yell at you! Just kidding... Seriously, you need to go out alone. When I started I didn't have a wingman to go out with me. I have winged several guys over the past year but that is very rare. I frequently go out alone and I have come to enjoy it. When you go into the venue as Mystery or anyone on this forum would tell you talk to everyone!

I want you to go out and be social. Make friends with guys so you have people to hang with later, make friends with women for obvious reasons, and make friends with the people that work in the venues you like to go to. You will develop a good friend base, social proof, and get some girls in the process. After time when you walk in the door you will already know a good amount of people in there, and it will start to feel more like home. Trust me on this!

So get off your butt and go out immediately! The only real way to get good with this stuff is repetition, to get it into your "automated response" as mystery would say.

Firstly, no time to scold my dude. As many others have pointed out, you do need to go into the world, and end the not so good times sitting without what you really want. I think you can benefit by working on some self actualization exercises that will help to boost your confidence. Confidence boosting activities that you can internalize are what you need to do. What are your hobbies, interest? Things that make your life enjoyable. That's what you need my man. peace,lvoe and succe SS

Thanks for the encouragement masters! I may have studied the mystery method but I keep forgetting the terms, but I feel that I should at least get my opening and comfort stages set before I go on into anything else, most of the times I open it goes dry. I have lots to learn and intimidation to conquer, I will keep trying.
I went out today for lunch but failed to open any sets, I will constantly remind myself the 3sec rule.
What are good day time openers though? Pls help this AFC.

Yes, let the 3 second rule own you at this point in time.

Yes, you have to conquer the intimidation factor. They are girls. They are human . . . just like you!

When you do open, work on teasing the girl. Teasing will start building immediate attraction, and if you tease well, she won't want you to leave.

I personally pretty much use all situational or on the fly openers and keep the set flowing the same way, on the fly. Kino is done the same way also. With that said, I don't have much in the way of specific examples, but you need to be aware of your surroundings and of what the girls are wearing, including things like earrings, nail polish, other piercings. Make a comment about any of that stuff to open her.

Duet wrote:

What are good day time openers though?

"Hi"

"Hi, how are you."

...and almost anything else.

Don't over think it, like Nike (and the army before them) say, "Just do it!"


2 good methods to get yourself opening:

-Start walking towards your target, don't think dont panic just walk towards them and when you get there open.

-While your just standing around, concentrate very deeply and imagine yourself not opening. Recall what that feels like, think about sitting home alone and how that makes you feel, let those negative feelings cover you! smuther you even!

Now imagine the same scenarios, like a video in your head, but this time you are confident, you walk upto the girl and start talking and she enjoys it. You can feel the positive energy fill up inside you like a bottle.

Now go open!


Little mind games and tricks like this work better then most people know...did you know you can make yourself feel warm when its cold just by thinking in a certain way?

If its cold where you live and you dont beleive me try it. Go out, wait a few mins for you to get a bit chilly. Now close your eyes and imagine that there is a fire at your feet, you can feel the warmth on your legs. Now you step into the fire, and you can feel the flames rush up your cltohing and surrounding your body, the heat is warm and it feels good, like being under the covers on a cold morning. Imagine yourself looking at your arms in your mind, and seeing them on fire, imagine looking down at your body and seeing the flames surround you. Imagine yourself (if you have seen the movie) like the human torch from fantastic 4, your completely surrounded by fire and it eminates from your body outwards pushing the cold away.

See, you feel warmer for a few mins, you might even start to feel overheated...of course the effects are temproary, but the point is that your mind controls you soo deeply that it can even change reality...i mean you werent hot, a second ago you were chilly and just by thinking you were warm, you felt warm.

What good does making yourself wamr do for PU, nothing...but if you can use the same concept and imagine yourself in good interactions with women, your mind wont know the difference. Combine this little mind game with walking towards your target and you could find yourself aproaching more comfortably and more often.

Hope this helps.

Welcome!

I strongly encourage you to take what Tripp, J, Ka, FHooks have said. They have all been there and done that.

On a side note - perhaps this might be able to put things into perspective for you.

I went out the other Friday to a local pub. It was ladies night. I was walking to the bathroom when I over-heard a conversation. A very cute blonde was looking around the room saying, "Damn. I need some d!ck tonight..."

I kid you not. Thats when it clicked. You'll be fine my man.

Haha! LaRockStar, if THAT doesn't spell out that women are at LEAST as horny as guys are . . . lol