How do I handle major blow outs of sets?

Well, it's been a while since I posted here.. Hey again.
School's starting up soon and I figured I'll get back into the forums.
During orientation, I approached some classmates from last year, now maybe I smelled or had something stuck in my teeth but the first 3 sets I opened blew me out horribly.
I came up to a friend and said "Hey bro, how've you been?"
He chuckles and walks past me with his friend...
Second set has two guys one girl, I approach with "Hey guys!"
Before I can even say anything they go "Hi." quietly and walk away....

Something wasn't right. I mean.. I wasn't a social reject of the school and I was in their social circle last year...
Kinda funny once I thought about it and the last set was a group of chicks I had class with who politely "went to the bathroom".

So I was like a "wtf moment" for a while and I wondered about what was wrong...
But then I saw my main friends I had lunch with and they were all the same and friendly, we laughed and talked for a bit before I left.

But that day was soo weird and when I got home, I pondered on this thought.
Well, I've decided it was just a weird day, REALLY weird day and that I should just move on..

But from your past experiences, could you get back into a good state after getting blown out of 3 consecutive sets??
I'd be in that "gloomy" mood you get every now and then when nothing goes right..

Thanks
<3 Grape

It's been a long time, but I've been there before. Sometimes I've pushed on through it to continue the night with whatever sets were left in that venue, other times I've switched venues and gone from there. In just a couple of cases I may have called it a night.

How do you push through? You realize that there are more hot girls out there and they are WANTING to talk to you.

L.A. Tripp wrote:

It's been a long time, but I've been there before. Sometimes I've pushed on through it to continue the night with whatever sets were left in that venue, other times I've switched venues and gone from there. In just a couple of cases I may have called it a night.

How do you push through? You realize that there are more hot girls out there and they are WANTING to talk to you.

That's all well and fine for night game, but for school, social situations and the like, it's a bit more complicated than just being able to change venues or call it a night.

Grape, I'd suggest you don't let it get to you and you laugh it off. Put a smile on your face and try to exude positive vibes. Even if people don't respond positively, if you continue with that frame, often they notice later that it didn't get to you and they end up changing their attitude for various reasons, from curiousity, to envy, to wanting to be around someone that does have that much positive energy and that they can thrive off of.

Yeah, I mean I still acted like I had my frame but I felt confused and awkward inside..
Still had a smile when I left the school and had a serious face while driving home. lol
But yeah, I'm sure it wasn't anything that will affect my game in the big picture so.. no biggie.

And whenever I go out to hang out with people, I'm in social mode and it's harder to focus on "inner game" and rather on socializing with people, thus I can't really control myself. Sometimes I do fake my frame but only when I have to, otherwise I let people know exactly how I feel non-verbally through body language, tone, etc.

It was a rare thing, getting blown out 3 times in a row. I can usually bring the sets back but man, was it weird.
Thanks a ton guys, appreciate it.

EDIT: OOHH I forgot to mention!!! They messaged me in facebook after the orientation and we talked like we usually would.. Weird ehh?

Grape wrote:

Yeah, I mean I still acted like I had my frame but I felt confused and awkward inside..
Still had a smile when I left the school and had a serious face while driving home. lol
But yeah, I'm sure it wasn't anything that will affect my game in the big picture so.. no biggie.

And whenever I go out to hang out with people, I'm in social mode and it's harder to focus on "inner game" and rather on socializing with people, thus I can't really control myself. Sometimes I do fake my frame but only when I have to, otherwise I let people know exactly how I feel non-verbally through body language, tone, etc.

It was a rare thing, getting blown out 3 times in a row. I can usually bring the sets back but man, was it weird.
Thanks a ton guys, appreciate it.

EDIT: OOHH I forgot to mention!!! They messaged me in facebook after the orientation and we talked like we usually would.. Weird ehh?

Well, you should get to the point where you don't have to "focus" on inner game, it should just be there. When I'm socializing, my inner game is just there.

Also, you can hide somethings by controlling your body language, but be aware that our body language "leaks" our true thoughts and feelings as well. Most people don't pick up on it, but someone who watches body language can tell.

Yeah, I mean the inner game is there when it's there but I can't really FORCE my inner game to be good when all is wrong.
And when I am having a "bad night" I'm usually very self-conscious and try to "fix myself up" the best I can using tools and body language.
Sometimes it helps sometimes it doesn't.
I just like living spontaneously and I'm also human so it takes me time to get past a few bad approaches and such.
Everyone has their good days and bad.. My ratio is increasing

Grape wrote:

Everyone has their good days and bad..

You're exactly right. We all do.

Grape wrote:

Yeah, I mean the inner game is there when it's there but I can't really FORCE my inner game to be good when all is wrong.
And when I am having a "bad night" I'm usually very self-conscious and try to "fix myself up" the best I can using tools and body language.
Sometimes it helps sometimes it doesn't.
I just like living spontaneously and I'm also human so it takes me time to get past a few bad approaches and such.
Everyone has their good days and bad.. My ratio is increasing

I'd suggest you read Awaken The Giant Within, at the very least, the chapters on NAC. He lays out a system for taking your actions/reactions to things and deciding for yourself how you would prefer to react in a given situation, then you get leverage on yourself so that you feel that continuing your old habit is unbarably painful for you. Next you interrupt the old habit when it is occuring, in order to break that frame and establish the new one. Then you create a new alternative to the old habit (so instead of feeling self conscious, shaken, etc, you get yourself to feel happy, laugh at the silliness of those around you and see the funny side of things) that is incredibly pleasurable and benifits you more than your old action would be (such as feeling crappy and losing frame). After that, you condition yourself to continually take the new action over the old one, through future pacing, consciously practicing when the instance occurs and running it through your head many times over (as our brains cannot distinguish the difference between something real and something imagined when it comes to our beliefs and actions), this causes strong neuro pathways to be created and your previously built pathways that caused you to take the old action deteriorate (if you don't use it, you lose it, works for neural pathways and it is scientifically proven), so that when the instance occurs, your body will automatically choose the new path instead of the old one, because it is more built into you. Then you test it out, by future pacing and seeing if the instance playing in your head causes you to automatically revert to your old habit, or the new one you desired and if it works fine, then you see if it works out in field.

This is very greatly boiled down and much better and more thoroughly explained in the book (should be considering it takes up a good chunk), but I guarantee you that it works, as I've already conditioned myself to stop doing several things I wanted to stop doing, yet couldn't seem to achieve through sheer willpower alone. For example, I'm a glutton, I LOVE food, like you have no possible comrehension of. I love the stuff so very incredibly much, I want to eat everything and all the time; in the past I've regularly eaten to the point of causing severe stomach pain and had to lie down rubbing my stomach for over an hour to make it subside. Serious issue, seriously affecting my health and I have started to put on the pounds because of it. I decided I was tired of it, I could no longer look myself in the mirror and ignore that I was slowly but surely gaining excess fat, so I decided for the who-knows-how-many-time, to go on a diet and start getting back into shape. I've tried many a time to no avail, because when I got hungry, I would snack on whatever was easiest and eventually that meant saying screw the diet, I'm just damned hungry. NOW though, I somewhat enjoy the sensation of hunger, as I've conditioned myself to associate it with achieving my goal and instead of eating the easiest and sweetest thing (I've been known to consume an entire box of oreos in a sitting ) I make sure to have veggies around and I find myself saying, "Yuck! I don't want to eat _____! A salad, or maybe some pickles would be MUCH more delicious!" and I totally believe it, I'm not just telling myself that. This is the power of creating new neuro associations and they will definitely help you to condition your inner game to be solidly ingrained and not something you need to focus on. It's just a conscious way of ingraining something that otherwise takes a long time of doing it unconsciously and it takes a fraction of a fraction of the time and you get to CHOOSE your results. POWERFUL!

BTW, scratch all that embarressing stuff about my gluttony from your minds guys....

Grape, I am in the presumptive mode at this instance. I presume that you will do pretty well, grades wise in high school this school year. Grape, I don't consider that a blow out at all my friend. To me you weren't even in conversation with any of those people for it to be considered a blowout. That was just a test run, that coincidentally didn't go off as well as you thought it should've. No harm there my friend. In fact in many facets of life we are all just awaiting for our rocket to come. Hell, I am college and girls literally pass up my intentions, when I speak to them a good portion of time. I don't let something that small reflect my perception of myself, and that's because I know that I have another opportunity to forge an outcome that I want. You have the same opportunity, Grape. You will see the same girls again, and if you chose to approach again you could. Peace,lvoe and succe SS P.S. It's high school and last I checked they usually don't conform to this sort of discipline about social dynamics. Take as kids acting like younger kids.