Why people are more attracted to guys/women who are hard to get?

I've recently got into this topic with a friend of mine.
I tried to explain it with the "survival and replication theory" , that everything you do, is to higher your chances of survival or replication, but this one doesn't seem to fit in this theory..
Anyone any ideas of the psychology behind this?

V

Vedere wrote:

I've recently got into this topic with a friend of mine.
I tried to explain it with the "survival and replication theory" , that everything you do, is to higher your chances of survival or replication, but this one doesn't seem to fit in this theory..
Anyone any ideas of the psychology behind this?

V

We humans tend to not value anything that is easily attained. Therefore we place a higher value on what is not easily achieved. With that said, if someone is easily "gotten" we don't value them, i.e. we look at them as easy/sluts/trash/etc. If someone is not easy, we automatically attach higher value to them. They are worth more in our eyes simply because they don't freely give themselves out to just anyone that asks for some.

I have a feeling this isn't what you're looking for, lol.

Vedere wrote:

I've recently got into this topic with a friend of mine.
I tried to explain it with the "survival and replication theory" , that everything you do, is to higher your chances of survival or replication, but this one doesn't seem to fit in this theory..
Anyone any ideas of the psychology behind this?

V

Would you really trust the woman who slept with every guy in the tribe (TWICE!!) to be the one who you depended on your survival and your replication? Or do you want the other sexually attractive, but unachievable goddess who has not let any of the tribe sample the forbidden fruit? Which one has a higher value for survival and replication?

Yeah guys , that's it !

It just didn't make any sense for me at first ( and my friend ), but now it does!
Damn you can explain almost everything with S&R value ( why friends let you down, why girls cheat on their boyfriends .. )

Thanks for your replies..!

By the way
I've read in a very interesting book recently that everybody is an egoist, and the people who claim they are not are the worst.
You have egoistic egoists : they just take what they want and whatever highers their S&R value.
You have altruistic egoists : They help others / serve others to make theirselves feel better. They don't care about the other they just want to feel better themselves. ( For example, giving money to charity is to give yourself a good feeling or to make sure you don't get an uncomfortable feeling ). Made sense to me and is close to the S&R thing in Mystery his new book ( that I still need to continue to read, cuz it's gold ).

The author however, doesn't say that, all being egoistic is a bad thing. It's a good thing. You help me, I help you and we both make eachother happier.

V

Glad we were able to help you bring it into focus lol. I guess that makes me an egotist . . . lol

Vedere wrote:

Yeah guys , that's it !

It just didn't make any sense for me at first ( and my friend ), but now it does!
Damn you can explain almost everything with S&R value ( why friends let you down, why girls cheat on their boyfriends .. )

Thanks for your replies..!

By the way
I've read in a very interesting book recently that everybody is an egoist, and the people who claim they are not are the worst.
You have egoistic egoists : they just take what they want and whatever highers their S&R value.
You have altruistic egoists : They help others / serve others to make theirselves feel better. They don't care about the other they just want to feel better themselves. ( For example, giving money to charity is to give yourself a good feeling or to make sure you don't get an uncomfortable feeling ). Made sense to me and is close to the S&R thing in Mystery his new book ( that I still need to continue to read, cuz it's gold ).

The author however, doesn't say that, all being egoistic is a bad thing. It's a good thing. You help me, I help you and we both make eachother happier.

V

I used to believe that too. But I don't anymore. I tend to shy away from nonfalsifiable arguments now. There is an altruism theory in the evolutionary discourse.