The Polish Girl Story . . . and Facebook Close

Here's an email I just got:

>>Hey Mike

I just signed up for this newsletter (this is the first one I got)
so I missed your last one where you described the "Facebook
Close." Could you please tell it to me? Thanks.

- Joe

----------------------------------

Joe,

That's actually a terrific question, because I'm
starting to think of the Facebook Close as being
a little bit of an unfair advantage for getting
a girl's number.

Let me explain:

Last night I was talking about the Facebook Closer
with my wing, Smitty, and he decided to start testing
it. What he discovered is that this close is on fire,
and it actually helped him open.

In a moment I'll explain the close and share a field report
- the (Polish girl story) with you, to further demonstrate.

Both are great examples of mixing Mystery style Pick-up Game
with Evil Dave After Game Method - and both involve the
Facebook close...

But before I get to the Polish girl story, I'm going to
cover some other questions, plus more Mystery and Evil
Dave news...

Here's another email:

>>Hey, Mike.

I was hoping I could get some advice. I don't know where else to
get GOOD advice these days..

I've been reading and watching Mystery's work for awhile and it has
helped me more than I ever imagined. I've been with women I never
thought I'd be with. I'm not an ugly guy, I have confidence issues
thanks to a "wonderful" upbringing, and the advice mystery shares
has helped me become more confident.

The problem is, my "after game" is lacking, and that's a hard
lesson I've learned many times in the last year. I'm hoping Evil
Dave's advice will help me out with that..

I'm the kind of guy who gets really wrapped up in my relationship
and can't seem to see the problems until the damage is done, and
I take it really hard when it ends and I don't see it coming..

What I'm looking for is advice. Advice about dealing with rejection
and heartbreak, and maybe some suggestions to make it easier to
step back and see what I'm doing wrong in my next relationship,
BEFORE it becomes a problem..

Thanks so much for the information and advice you guys share.

Refuysd

-------------------------------

Hey Refuysd,

You're coming to the right place. Actually Evil Dave
has helped me get past the "heartbreak stage" relationships
time and again.

The secret? It turns out that usually, if you're suffering
from heartbreak, it's because your perspective is a little
"off." The good news about that is, if you can find the
right perspective, it makes all of the difference in the
world.

I asked Evil Dave to share a good perspective with you
and this is what he said:

"Refuysd, if you are getting blind-sided by a breakup,
that means you aren't doing the most important thing -
you aren't skillfully building up an understanding of
your woman's thinking and motivations, and then
you aren't using that info to creating a high-value
relationship.

"Mystery, wisely, focuses strongly on DHV's and DLV's
(demonstrations of higher and lower value). Well, once
you are in a relationship, the best DHV there is, is to
create a high-value relationship. From a woman's
perspective, so what if you are good at other stuff in
life, if you suck at relationships themselves - if you
don't understand what is going on in her mind?
And being inattentive to what she is really thinking
and feeling is a serious DLV - it will take you right out
of the game... or the after-game.

"Regarding feeling better after a breakup, here are some
pithy sound bites for you: 1) women are very replaceable -
separate the idea of loving somebody from the idea of
dating somebody. You can replace an ex-girlfriend the
next day, and that doesn't mean you love(d) them any
less. 2) If a really great and attractive woman were currently
right there with you, very interested in you, you would
probably forget all about your ex. So... why not cut
to the chase and forget all about your ex right now?
3) Setting goals for the past is stupid and obviously
ineffective, but people do it all the time - it is called
'wishing the past were different.' Focus your goals
on the future, and you'll be happier and more effective.

"I hope that helped. I wish that I could go on and on,
but that's why I'm taking the next 6 months to create
over 10 hours of video training on After-Game. I've
purposely kept my training very low priced so that
virtually anybody can afford it, because I think that
guys really need it."

Here's another question for Evil Dave:

>>Hi there mike, my name is Gabriel, I had been involve in the
sarging world almost like a year and a half, I'm sure that i have
good skills in the pick up artist game, I'm from Mexico, and living
in Queretaro, I'm 20 yrs old and i would like to ask you two
things, can you help me with the Evil Dave lectures, because I
think that is so awesome that kind of level up that you can get in
a relationship.

I came out of a relationship that opened my eyes about the
importance of relationships. For instance, do I always have
to be the "alpha male' when I'm around girls? Or is there
another way?

Thank you by your attention

- Gabriel

-------------------------

Gabriel,

Thanks for your question. We're actually
getting in more and more letters from guys
who have their pick-up game down pretty
solid, but who also want to advance their
After Game starting now.

Again, I asked Evil Dave for his advice
on your letter.

Here's what he gave me for you:

"Gabriel, there is a threshold of value in a relationship,
that when you are past it, the idea, for your woman,
of being attracted to somebody else, is totally
laughable. To my wife, I'm the alpha male, in
essentially any situation. And, in any particular
social situation, I don't need to do anything,
other than not make a total ass of myself,
to make that happen (given that I create a very
high value relationship context in the first place).

"Here's the key concept: there is no such as thing
as THE alpha male in the room. Unlike a pack of
monkeys or a street gang, in a normal situation
the question of "who is the alpha male?" is
relative to the observer.

"What you want to do is to give her a "reasonable
excuse" for her to feel that you are the alpha
male in her eyes. To do that, be skillful and focused
in one aspect of life that she can respect, and don't
be a dumbass anywhere that she thinks is important.
She wants to believe that you to be the best man
there - all she needs is an excuse."

*********************************************************
Area51Lifestyle Insider Tech: the Facebook close
*********************************************************

Another example of information that's not out
there yet, is the Facebook Close.

After all, our ancestors may well have had almost
identical biological wiring as we do, but they didn't
have the Internet.

Here's how it works:

Instead of going straight for asking for a girl's number,
I ask if she has Facebook.

One of three things can happen:

1. She says yes.

If she does this, ask what her name is and say you'll
add her as a friend.

2. She says no.

I'll cover this during the Polish girl story in
a second. (She had just deleted her Facebook account.)

3. She says: "What's Facebook."

This is a great opportunity for more comfort building
before going back for a number close - or better yet,
ask her for her email address and tell her you'll send
her an invitation.

Before I get to the psychology behind the Facebook
close, and why it's worked for me dozens of times
without a single rejection, let me give you an example:

*************************
(Polish girl story)
*************************

Here's the story:

This started out as one of those nights that
I didn't already feel motivated to go out.

It was Tuesday night. I had gone out Monday with
Smitty, but he couldn't go out that night. Plus,
I was hanging out with friends until around 10 PM
anyways - so bowing out seemed reasonable.

But then Smitty text messaged me and reminded
me of the Mystery "facing fear" video that Mystery
filmed from my pad in La Jolla this Summer...

(Before he shot that video, Mystery had decided
not to go out - but after the video we went out
and had an amazing time.)

Here's that video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWnPH-kXeZM

Anyways, I decided to at least go out to get
a bite to eat...

***********************************
Why an effective Avatar is way
better than wearing a name tag.
***********************************

I went into a restaurant that is in walking distance from
my place, and was greeted by a charging, hugging
girl I had met a few nights before.

Now I'll admit that I didn't recognize her because
she had straightened her hair (when I met her, her
hair was curly) and she was in a cute dress, instead
of work clothes like when I met her before.

(She's a bartender.)

Anyways, she bounded up to me and reintroduced herself,
complimented my Avatar, and asked me to bounce with her
to another place to meet up with some mutual friends.

******************************
Welcome to pre-selection
******************************

Before we left, my bartender friend mentioned that
she had a friend who might like to come with us, but
who currently was being a bit of a wet noodle.

Even though the wet noodle girl was married, she was
quite cute and the idea of rolling into our next
location with two girls on my arm instead of one was
appealing - so I helped convince the wet noodle girl to
come by being extra fun with her.

When we arrived at our destination, it was much easier
to meet and get great reactions out of new girls because
of my two friends, who made a lap around the bar with me
when we got in, for an extra dose of pre-selection.

I noticed one really cute girl soon after we arrived.

Since I was already heavily engaged in gathering
pre-selection, and implying that I was the leader
of men by being very alpha with the guys at the bar,
I waited to approach her.

**************************
It's cool to be gay...
**************************

One of my friends who lived most of his life in
Paris, Marc, opened my eyes to a nice distinction.

A few years after Marc and I became friends he told
me that he had figured out that he was gay. Anyways,
at some point, Marc told me that the gay clubs in
Paris were some of the best places in the world to
meet women.

That's because most of the guys there aren't competition,
but the girls can be there and have a lot of fun. That
fact helped me become very comfortable with joking about
being gay. And I quickly realized that joking you're
gay can be a big advantage in attraction.

(That's because saying you're gay is a disqualifier,
and it's a challenge - plus it doesn't covey interest
which disarms the girl and the folks protecting her.)

Here's how I opened her:

I noticed that the girl I was interested in inched
closer and closer to me, and seemed like she was
practically shouting to be opened.

So when a cook pushed his way between us carrying
a load of boxes I looked over my shoulder at her
and said: "Wow, did you see the sparks fly? I think
I may have had my first gay moment. Did you see it?"

She laughed and said: "No, I didn't."

"Oh yeah, it was magical." I said, as I saw the cook
walking back in, this time carrying a keg. "Watch
cloasly this time." I said.

The guy walked between us without acknowledging either
of us.

"See!?" I said, pointing at the guy as if he had
smacked my ass as he walked past.

******************************************
Your avatar can convey pre-selection
******************************************

The girl laughed again, and was now smiling from ear
to ear. "Are you from New York?" she said.

Now I know what she was thinking. She was thinking
like I was dressed like I was from New York. While
that's not really how it came to be - I dress a lot
like I'm from Hollywood - I decided to roll with it.

"Yes, I was born there." I was.

"I can tell, your clothes give it away." It's a nice
thing to get complimented by a girl you're interested
in for what you're wearing. That's because good
choices in clothing actually convey pre-selection.

(Since most guys can't dress themselves without help.)

Where are you from? I asked.

"New York." She said. It seemed obvious that she
was originally from Eastern Europe, but I didn't
want to break the flow of things, so we chatted
a bit about New York before I asked where she was
originally from.

*****************************************************
Then I stumbled across a new type of routine:
Know the best version of your family's story
*****************************************************

One of the things that Mystery discusses in
Project Hollywood Formula is the ins and outs
of creating your own grounding routine.

A grounding routine is where you convey your
story to a new girl once you've gotten to know
each other.

Now, this girl is Polish, and my mother is
Latvian. Those two countries have a lot of
history and she was well aware of it when
I told her I was Latvian.

"In the 1500s a Polish princess married
a Latvian Prince and for that time they were
the same country - and it was the time of the
greatest prosperity the Polish ever had."

Things were going well. So I decided to go
straight into some deep comfort - and of course
I was brushing her arms, and shoulders - what
Mystery calls Kino escalation.

***********************
"It's a love story"
***********************

There are lots of versions of any story. So when
Mystery told me to make sure that my stories conveyed
emotional appeal instead of pure logic, I realized
that a love story was one of the best ways to go...

I told her the story of how my grandfather and
grandmother came from America to Latvia during
world war 2 - and I pointed out to her again and
again that it was a love story.

(She liked that and repeated it back to me
several times.)

Everything was going perfectly. Until I realized
that I had made a huge mistake.

***********
Whoops!
***********

After about a half an hour or more of conversation
her friend, whom I had totally ignored, interrupted
our conversation looking very frustrated.

That's because I forgot to get my new Polish friend
to introduce me to her friend, so I could then merge
our little group of three into another group to
occupy her friend and generally raise value.

Instead now I had an emergency on my hands.

"We've got to go now." her friend said, popping her
eyes wide when she said now.

"Cool," I said, starting to rock backwards, "Do you
have Facebook?" I said?

"No. I just deleted my account." She said.

"Oh, well then just give me your number." I said,
pulling out my phone - assuming the sale, as
they say.

I saw her hesitate for a moment, but I didn't break
my frame. I started typing her name into an entry
in my phone book. Then she gave it to me.

***************************************************
The psychology behind the Facebook Close
***************************************************

Since I started using the Facebook close, about
a month ago, hardly a night has passed where
I didn't get a facebook name or a phone number.

And it's yet to fail. (Knock on wood.)

The reason it works so well is that Facebook
is a very social place, girls love to play
around on it. Plus it's the hip new thing, so
often girls are trying to actually build their
friends list.

Oh yeah, and of course it sounds less threatening,
and is less likely to draw the ire of their friends
(who won't like it if their friend appears easy.)

Plus it flat out gives you two chances to get
a girl's contact information. (Let's face it, the
Polish girl was probably telling the truth about
not having an account, but if she didn't it would
give me a chance to be persistent without acting
like a wuss.

****************************
After Game implications
****************************

Now, one of Evil Dave's area's of expertise that
he hasn't talked about, is online dating.

I actually met my last serious girlfriend dating
online using Evil Dave's advice.

So I realized that there were potential advantages
to communicating online as a step in
building a relationship.

That's because it's a nice safe way to stalk
each other. (Which means it's a great time to
load up on demonstrations of higher value -
like being pre-selected by women, being the
leader of men, the willingness to emote and
protector of loved ones.)

Plus, about half of the girls I've met actually
post their number on Facebook.

(If her number is posted, I usually text
message her on her cell phone as the
next step.)

******************************************************
We'll see how it goes when I meet her tomorrow...
******************************************************

Of course I don't know how things will work
out. We've been text messaging for a couple
of days and we're supposed to meet tomorrow.

But I will say that a couple of girls who saw
me talking to the Polish girl have walked up
to me since and mentioned it, with a smile.

Ok, that's the story.

Next time, the lingerie girl story.

Talk Soon,

Mike Long