Does Juggler Method Peacock?

“Do you teach them how to dress?”

That’s the question I get most often from my female friends.

Once they know what I do, this is one of the top three questions that follows.

What does this tell you?

Well, it should tell you that most guys dress like $*!@.

But before you run out and buy a ton of Affliction shirts, hear me out.

Back in the day when the pickup community was young(er) some guys advocated dressing “cool” and adopting a “rock star” or “celebrity” or “model” look.

I got nothing against this.

But what happened was it made very well-intentioned 34-year-old middle management guys with 1950’s style haircuts run out and buy a ton of boutique clothes from companies like Affliction and Ed Hardy. Some guys couldn’t afford those and just went to Hot Topic and looked weird - high school bondage style.

See, the clothes reflect the man. If the clothes are try-hard, then the man is try-hard.

Remember the house parties you went to back in college? Cool. Let’s play a game.

I’m going to profile two types of guys. Guess which ones got laid…

Type 1:

These guys wear khaki shorts from Gap and polo shirts from Abercrombie that smell like Old Spice. They spend like 40 minutes getting ready - showering, ironing their shirts, putting gel in their hair, and packing a pen, notepad, wallet, car keys, and a lighter even though they don’t smoke to give to girls that ask for a light (because they heard it on an old David D. video) into their cargo pockets - for a house party that involves beer, chicks, probably a fight or two, and beer pong.

Type 2:

These guys step out of the shower around midnight. Throw on some busted up jeans, a white t-shirt, and maybe a skull cap and roll into the party just as it’s starting to get fun.

So who gets laid?

Well, if you have any sort of social calibration, you should easily pick type 2.

I can just hear some of you guys whining. “But at least the type 1 guys looked good!”

Listen, if you picked type 1, don’t worry. I’m going to explain why none of that $*!@ matters.

“What?” you say. “Of course clothes matter. Women notice clothes. It’s like really important, everyone says so.”

Listen up guys. The clothing you wear is a direct reflection of your social calibration. If you show up at a college house party dressed nicely, you look like a jackass. Similarly, if you show up at a nice club (assuming you’d even get in) wearing a white t-shirt and old jeans and a skull cap, you’re also a jackass.

“But you just said that guys who wore t-shirts and skull caps got laid!”

Don’t misinterpret the message.

Here is the message, loud and clear…

Whatever you wear, even if you peacock, don’t look like you’re trying hard.

For example, it’s getting cold here in New York. As the cool weather sets in, I’m rockin a great vintage leather biker jacket. Leather works great in the Fall. And it gives me a cool edge to my look that is totally congruent with my personality.

But come January or February, you look like an asshole if you wear leather walking around New York. It’s just too cold to make sense. So everyone wears wool or cashmere. (Ok, obviously not everyone. Yes, I exaggerate sometimes.)

So how does this relate to pickup?

Well, no matter what style you have, make sure you look comfortable in it. If you work Monday through Friday 9-5 in khaki pants and a tie, and then on Saturdays you put on skinny Rock and Republic jeans, New Rock boots, pendants, Affliction shirts, and a ring on your middle and pinky finger, you will not be a congruent man. Your lifestyle is fake. You’re faking it, and you know it.

That’s not to say you can’t wear all that stuff. I have best friends that pull that off. But it’s because they live a lifestyle congruent with it. I can just imagine some of you guys pulling a chick in your peacock uniform then taking her back to your one bedroom apartment and her realizing what a sham it all is. You’re not the rock star she thought she picked up at the bar. You’re an engineer that dresses fun on the weekends.

I know I’m being tough. But it’s because I think that self acceptance is really important in this journey. If you want the cool lifestyle, you gotta create it for yourself. You can’t just play pretend on Friday and Saturday night.