Randomized top friends

On my myspace page my top friends are randomized.
I've always done this, and it's displayed. A few people who ask about it will get an honest answer as a little bit of dicking around: I view everyone as equal so I don't give anyone a set rank. But for the most part, no one bothers to ask me why, but nearly everyone knows that I do it.

What are the effects of a randomized top friends list?

I always suggest putting your family first, followed by best friends, followed by music bands.

Whatever you do DON'T put any hot girls in your top friends, especially if you're romantically interested in them.

My top friends is my social proof place online...to me its the digital equivlent to who id be seen out with at a bar (or like to be seen out with).

I mix it with my good friends and some attractive/cool people i know but am not really that close to just because they look cool/hot/interesting.

Now my profile is only for people i actually know...so i dont have like porn models or celebs or bands idk in my friends list or anything, but the more attractive girls end up in my top friends so that others see them and assume i have presection going on.

I also keep it balanced, i dont want it to seem like im just trying hard to make it appear like women like me...i have a buddy who does that, hes got like 90% chicks in his top friends and i know for a fact like 75% of them arent really friends. So  i have about half guys and girls in my top...but i kinda pick and chose which ones based on looks, interesting/unique profile pics, and those who are really good friends.

To be honest, we are probably all overthinking it, then again i have had some girls comment to me about having a "good mix of friends" or "alot of hot friends"...which all gives me leverage to associate and integrate myself into that sterotype if i so choose.

None of you answered my question: What happens when your friend list is random?

Useful information, but I already knew what you two have said. Thanks for trying to useful though.

truthfully if somone i knew did that and they said it was random i would think they dont have a tight group of friends and so they just put randoms they arent friends with on.

i guess it would depend on the reason was told and the numberof friends.

ie if you said you dont treat anyone differently or favourably, that they are all equal and you had a mass of people i would think that most people you have as friends are strangers.

just one example of how i would take that

AltruisticAssassin wrote:

None of you answered my question: What happens when your friend list is random?

Useful information, but I already knew what you two have said. Thanks for trying to useful though.

Couldnt tell you because i dont randomize my friends list, all i can tell you is what i personally do, just offering a different view on the subject.

My guess would be that the only people who are really gonna remotely care about your top friends are your friends who take the thing literally and expect you to put them in that category and don't see themselves up there. As to what they would think when you tell them its random, id say 9 out of 10 of them will just drop it there, the extent of them caring about it will end there...the other one is a crap shoot as to what theyd think. I'd assume some might think your lying (until it changes a couple times on them), some might think the way Mattjacks has suggested, others might actually buy the crap you feed them, and still others will have different perspectives on it.

All in all i think the person who should worry about it the most if at all is just yourself and how the people showing up in your top friends reflect on you.

there is no crap to buy.
I may be into pick-up but I don't like to lie or feed people a line of crap. I even make sure my cold readings are accurate.

So far all I've noticed is less people bitching about their placement.

AltruisticAssassin wrote:

I view everyone as equal so I don't give anyone a set rank.

That is the crap your selling, its human nature to rank, rate and compare. If you didnt do this everyone would be your best friend...even people you dont like, don't know, or arent really that close to. Even if you were capable of such a stance on friendship, most people are not and thus most people will think your feeding them crap.

It's not crap. I do see everyone as having equal potential, thus we are all equal. I've never had a best friend because I never think of my friends as better than the rest of them. I think that itself is crap.

I give everyone and equal chance, and honestly don't hate anyone. I know there are people that don't like me, but that doesn't mean I don't like them.

I hate the top friends thing as well personally. I wouldn't go as far as Assassin, I do see some people as more important than other people but I don't like it displayed on my profile. It just seems a bit imature.

Maybe you've bought into it yourself, but i can tell by the way you just altered what you said that its not 100% accurate.

This is what you first said...

AltruisticAssassin wrote:

I view everyone as equal so I don't give anyone a set rank.

Now its become...

AltruisticAssassin wrote:

I do see everyone as having equal potential, thus we are all equal.

This is called associative thinking...my girlfriend is cheating...my girlfriend is out with another guy, so she is cheating. People do this to try and bridge the "gap" in what is really there and what they want to beleive. Often times we do it without even realizing we are doing it. In the example above...which is very common, we often convince ourselves someone is cheating without any real tangible proof...we make assosiations to file the gaps in the information we actually have to come to a conclusion.

Also people make small adjustments in how they put something when they don't fully beleive what they are saying. Theives do this all the time (im not associating you with this group, just using them as an example. Did you steal the money...no...we have your finger prints on it...well i took it but it wasnt stealing because i didnt think it had an owner. This is why any good lawyer, police officer, or disciplinarian will ask you the same question at least twice. It doesnt mean the person is lying, but it may show they dont fully beleive in what they are saying.

You may beleive you hold everyone in the same light, but from the sound of it your kidding yourself. I'd even go as far as saying your using that idealism as a defence mechanism to protect yourself against something.

**FYI - Im not trying to bash you or belittle you, for the people on these forums to be helpful and grow, it requires us to be honest with each other...even if that means saying what the people dont wana hear. I happen to be a very straightforeward, no bs type of person...and if i didnt like you i wouldnt waste my time being honest with you.**

randy1random wrote:

I hate the top friends thing as well personally. I wouldn't go as far as Assassin, I do see some people as more important than other people but I don't like it displayed on my profile. It just seems a bit imature.

This i can understand. It would make sense from a social survival standpoint to not want to upset some of the people in your social circle.

For future reference, I always value constructive criticism. You're aim is NOT to make me look stupid, nor is it some kind of ego boost. You're just stating your point of view on a person [me].

Both my statements line up with each other, to an extent. You've pointed out the crack in the argument, so I'll agree with you.

Saying that everyone has equal potential only means we're all equal at the very start of our lives. How well we adapt in the process of life and what we achieve changes over time and some will fly high above the rest.

But I still don't like to give my friends ranks and don't see them as better than other because I don't think it's a very important thing to do. This really doesn't benefit me much. It's more of an attitude that I carry where I'm willing to give everyone the same change as the next person.

I think people put too much meaning in that top friends thing. Its ridic. When I had myspace (which I took down) I chose not to display the top friends because of the same reasons.

Honestly, I doubt anyone will notice unless they were on your page everyday....

I just now reallized that my top friends and comments aren't even displayed unless you look for them.