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 Newbie from KY

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Sydrian
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Male Number of posts : 173
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Location : Kentucky
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Registration date : 2009-06-28

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PostSubject: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSun Jun 28, 2009 1:48 am

I'm 31, and a computer tech/digital pressman in Kentucky. The job is actually more interesting than it sounds, and I have upward potential where I'm at. I have a very broad interest in just about anything. I usually dabble in a different hobby every few months. Earlier this year I was learning how to play Go, last summer it was electronics, right now I'm into magic, dabbled with hypnosis, considered reading up on handwriting analysis. It makes me a pretty well rounded person, and I can talk with a good level of insight, and understanding on a wide range of subjects. I also worked in retail for five years, and thanks to this I'm pretty good with rapport as long as my nerves don't interfere. I've read The Game, and working through Mystery Method as Mystery seems to be the PUA that, for whatever reason clicks for me. Looking back, the last girlfriend I had, was basicly step for step the MM sans the fact she opened me. I was just put in a situation that the MM was on autopilot without even being aware of it. Ironicly, my anxiety in going after her right away played straight into winning the friends over 1st, since it was more comfortable for me. It's interesting looking back at how I already have PROOF that the method works, and I didn't even know the method at the time.

My single biggest goal at this point is getting past my AA. Its my single biggest road block at this point. I wouldn't really call it anxiety anymore, as I don't get that nervous OMG feelings, or the 'what if" questions in my head. Its much more of a mental block, and my engine is stuck in neutral. I get plenty of approach invitations, but a mixture of old habits and a complete ignorance of what to do stops me.I used to not even be able to handle being approached, but in the last few years I've handled that with success. I guess I've always been a little socially awkward, but Ive gotten most of that straightened out, but still feel awkward in larger groups. Much more comfortable in one on one situations. Looking back at my past, I'd say I'm able to build attraction when one on one, I just often overlook it, so I fail to take it anywhere. I'm uncomfortable with kino, but that's mainly a lack of experience issue than anything. I also used to have body image issues related to being underweight, and not really having a flattering style for myself. That is something that I've worked on for the last 4-5 years, and have finally come to terms with. I'm pretty comfortable with myself, and have the self confidence I need to move forward at this point. I'm just stuck with a lot of the habits from being self conscious & shy when I was younger.

Ive been aware of the community for several years, and get the general idea, but my AA has kept me from ever really being in the game so to speak. As for success my with women in the past, has been so so. Ive had 3 girlfriends, but none of the relationships lasted very long. One of them was a quality girl, but our lives were going in different directions, such is life. Looking back, and knowing what I know now, Ive had the oppourunity to have many more women in my life, I just failed to recognize it at the time. Finally, its not just that I want to add women into my life. I also feel like I'm in a rut, and need to expand my social circle. I feel the need to become successful/comfortable in social situations so I can move forward with my life personally and professionally.

I'm going to throw out two minor questions, while I'm here. First, having been in a frat, I wonder if this is a DHV or a DLV. Frats usually have a negative connotation, and people will accuse you of "paying" for friends. On the other hand, a successful fraternity fosters the social abilities of its members as well as it can. I formed good bonds in those years, and it helped a lot with my general social anxiety at the time. On another note, I have a rather common first name, but my last is rather unique. Most of my friends eventually refer to me by my last, instead of my first name. It's already part of my avatar naturally, should I give my last name(Trego) over my first(Jeremy) to help stand out, or does it come off aloof/arrogant? I figure if Neil Straus can go by Styles, surely my last name is fair game. Finally, on a positive note, I went out of my way to open a HB8 today while shopping for cologne without an AI. Moving target too, saw her walking by, turned just enough to make it clear I was addressing her when I spoke. Got her opinion on Pi by Givenchy, which i really liked. She happily took the bait, a sample strip with the cologne on it. I didn't try stacking into anything else, or number closing, but it's a 1st step.
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L.A. Tripp
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Male Number of posts : 4766
Age : 51
Location : Evansville, IN
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSun Jun 28, 2009 2:53 am

Welcome to the forum Sydrian.

What part of KY are you in?

Honestly, your main hurdle is most guys main hurdle. It's a common issue, so don't feel bad. Plus, the fact that you opened that girl that way is great.

Paint the frat in a positive light. It's how you present it that makes the most difference.

On your name . . . you could go either way. If you're comfortable just giving your last name, go that way. If you're more comfortable giving your first, go that way. Because it's common doesn't matter. As long as YOU are interesting.

Personally, I actually use Tripp in the field. It works for me. And, it is a real name . . . for some people, lol. I actually do get asked "is that your real name?" So I'll say, "that's what my friends call me." Or, I'll say "I'm the Hitch of Evansville" because I also have that rep around here.
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSun Jun 28, 2009 9:38 pm

Hitch of Evansville? We're pretty close, I'm in Owensboro. Went out, last night, didn't really make any progress. There was a 3 set I should of opened. I was on the dance floor having a good time, and they got a kick of out of something I was doing. Maybe I made a fool of myself, either way I should of busted their balls over it. Of course I didn't think about calling em out for hatin on my good time till well after the fact. Not to mention a set of 9s is hard to approach till you build some confidence.

More importantly, I didn't take anything in a negative light last night. Its taken me a few years to get the negative chatter in my head to go away. I don't have that voice in my head saying "what if", its more of a "dumbass, you had every oppourinity".
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSun Jun 28, 2009 10:41 pm

At least you aren't shy about going out and having a good time in front of others.

Yeah, with you being in Owensboro, you should come up this way soon and hit the clubs with me.

I went to one we have called Icon last night. Was packed. Was a good night. Have you been to any of the venues up here?
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSun Jun 28, 2009 11:05 pm

I've been to a few places. Fast Eddies, Hammerheads, and one other place last year with my last gf. I've heard of Icon a few times, like its the kind of place you could suit up and hit. But yea, being myself regardless of what other people think has always been a strong point of mine. I'm always me.
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 3:23 am

Yeah, Icon is a bit more "high class" than the others, usually. Out of the places you've been, which one did you prefer?
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randy1random
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 4:32 am

Welcome to the forum! You seem like a pretty interesting guy, you shouldn't have any trouble once you get past you approch anxiety.
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 6:23 am

Tripp, Fast Eddy's kind of sucked due to the fact it was probably a 110 degrees inside. Other than that, they all seemed like decent places to chill. Honestly I could have a good time just about anywhere short of a true roughneck kind of place.

Randy, thanks. I like to think of myself as a "renaissance geek". My geek factor leans twards knowing a little about a lot, as opposed to a lot bout little.

I do have a bit of nice guy syndrome still, but its not a crippling issue anymore. Looking back on the last few years, I would say I do have a strong frame that doesn't need outside validation. Its funny, I've told girls that I'm a geek, and Ive somehow, blindly built enough value at that point they immediately tell me I'm not. Of course I only bring up the geek word, to reframe it into the positive connotation I view it with. Done that for years before I even heard of PUA. Its funny, but some of this stuff is very difficult for me, and some of it is already so natural I didn't know I was doing this stuff till I read about it.
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 7:05 am

Cool. When are you able to get up this way again?
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 7:38 am

Probably next weekend. I'm supposed to hang out with the one ex-gf Im still actually friends with Friday in Newburg. On the other hand, I'm having some minor cooling issues with my car. Its great on the open road, and I can get around town with zero problems. I went to Evansville this weekend, and stopped at Borders. When I went to leave the heat was close to pegged on the meter. It took about 40 minutes to cool to a point I felt safe with. It was below half way the whole way there, and wasn't an issue a few hours later to come home. For some reason the car just doesn't want to cool well in traffic, and does a very bad job cooling off parked. I got the radiator replaced last year, and at the time I was told the heat gauge ran hot, so it might be nothing, but its a few weeks before I can shell out to get it checked.
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 9:39 am

Aahh, my Firebird has a temp gauge that's fucked up too. Says it's hot when really it's not. The first time it did that I pulled it over, touched the cap, didn't get burned, opened the radiator, it didn't spew, lol. The needle was in the red . . .

Well, if you do make it up here drop me a line on this thread. We should meet up.
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jun 29, 2009 6:01 pm

Cool, my car guy said it was normal . Apparently Ford cars have a wide heat gauge, and I was just ignorant of the fact. Dance
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~Meg~
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeWed Jul 01, 2009 9:22 am

Welcome Welcome!

I'll admit I just skimmed your post Scared:
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeWed Jul 01, 2009 8:01 pm

OMG, I spill my heart and soul for all to see and you only SKIM it?!? I'm devastated, heart broken, I feel so, so.... Ah screw it, thanks for the welcome!
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeSat Jul 04, 2009 7:08 am

Tripp, It will be another few weeks before I'll roll around to the Evansville area, I'll give a shout when I can.
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Sydrian
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeMon Jul 27, 2009 7:45 pm

I'm planning on heading over to Evansville some time in the next week or so. It's no wonder I never meet women here in Owensboro. Since I've been in a mindset to be on the lookout I've realized that the day game in this down is non existent. Our mall gets less traffic on a Saturday than most do my noon on a Monday. And even when I do get around, all I see are teenagers. The bar scene is very hit or miss, and when its miss its the same bar rats you always see. Maybe I've just got a bad mindset about Owensboro, but it's defiantly not a coincidence that the last 2 g/f I've had, and the last 4-5 girls I've talked to have been from the Evansville area. Guess the point I'm making is just to get enough traffic to work on my AA, Owensboro isn't going to cut it.
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Newbie from KY   Newbie from KY I_icon_minitimeFri Aug 07, 2009 2:20 pm

There are plenty of opportunities here in Evansville.
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