The Next ‘Thinking’ Step For Approach Anxiety

Don’t think… just do.

Okay, now I know that seems a little off base… but here’s the deal.

We ain’t saving the whales here, boys.

Stop making such a big deal about something so INSIGNIFICANT.

Going back to yesterday, you’ll remember that I said that approach anxiety stems from two things:

Anticipation of a “bad” or “worse” case scenario result.
A perceived status gap.

In other words, you don’t want to feel stupid.

But… think about it this way. Even if there IS a status gap, she’s not going to know unless you TELL her. And, even if there is a status gap and SHE KNOWS it… women have a knack of trying to raise the status of COOL people.

Ever have a female friend try to “hook” you up with someone… status raise.
Ever have a female friend try to CONSTRUCTIVELY help you out with your “look”… status raise.

Here is my worst case scenario that I personally think of everytime I meet a woman… no matter how hot.

At least if I see her around again, I’ll be able to say ‘hi’ and have a little conversation… which ups my social proof… increases my ‘net social worth’… and makes me feel good.

Is that so bad?

Hell no.

Truth is, if you relax and have a light but fun conversation women will RARELY… and I MEAN RARELY just blow you off.

Frankly, about 30% of women are just plain outgoing and flirty… and can really help you carry a conversation.

(These people are usually “hubs”… people that know people… and you SHOULD make it a point to get to know them regardless… as I explain in “Explode Your Influence“)

Also, you should know that most women really DO want to talk to someone in most situations… even IF they are with other guys.

I can tell you with 100% accuracy that women (of all ages) are out on the prowl… looking for cool guys to hang with. I’ve heard it time and time again.

They wonder where all the good guys are.

They SAY these things… and they mean them.

I just thought of something… a little story if you will that relates a bit. Women, I know you’re reading this… just remember that your friends are RUINING it for you.

Here’s why.

I remember a year or two back, I was hanging out with a buddy of mine that is no slouch when it comes to the ladies…

He’s got that “knack”.

Anyway, we’re sitting there in this little ‘block party’ type situation when he looks over to me and tells me about the group of five women that are beyond of shadow of a doubt… going to talk to us within 15 minutes…

His radar is pretty good… did I mention that?

Such enough, one of the women saunters over and begins a conversation. Now, she was cute… but not overly special (I know, that sounds superficial as hell, but it’s my story damnit) and my friend really didn’t want to talk to her.

She was inviting us to hang with them at another bar… and my friend politely declined the invite.

When she walked away… I told him… “You’re a dumbass”

“Why, she just wasn’t my type… and neither were her friends…”

“That’s not the point. Number one, it’s just me and you scratching our nuts right now and we had a cool opp to hang out with some people that we don’t know… 5 cute girls in fact… and you decline.

“Number two. All women have hot friends. Who’s to say that they weren’t meeting up with more people.”

“Number three. Two guys… 5 girls… one place… everyone there is going to wonder who we are and why these 5 women chose to hang out with us (because even though WE know better, conventional wisdom still says that women do the choosing) and we’ve already got a leg up in the competition category for other women… other women can already ASSUME that we aren’t stalkers… and people can watch us truly interact with others, and since we ALWAYS have a good time and start harmless trouble… who WOULDN’T want to meet us.”

“And Number four… the most important. Did you SEE the way that the WHOLE GROUP was looking at us? She was just the spokesperson. Did it ever cross your mind that it could have ended up being a 2 on 5 afterparty later on after we go to the Waffle House (wink)?”

Then he laughed and said:

“You’re right. I’m a dumbass”

So, as an aside (and I know that I’m rambling a bit today), I never blow off a woman when she comes to talk to me.

I treat her the way I’d like to be treated.

I can’t tell you how many times a so-so woman has come up to talk… and within 10 minutes, her HOT friend comes up to join the conversation.

It happens a lot, when you know how to have a good time.

Think about this. Most of the time, you kinda have to ‘make do’ with the environment that you’re in:

Work
School
Neighborhood
Bar

If you practice having fun… no matter the situation… it will help you with approach anxiety, and talking to strange people in general.

So talk to the woman that’s not your type. Who cares. Don’t judge the situation until AFTER it unfolds…

You might surprise yourself.

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you MY personal problem with women… I think you’ll want to see this.

I can’t tell you how many times a so-so woman has come up to talk… and within 10 minutes, her HOT friend comes up to join the conversation.


Tripp that would be the woman equvilent to a PUA's pivot right?
I really like this. Even before PUA I always talked to whoever came up to me just because like you said you never know who is really interested so they send a spokeswoman..Ok now that I have read this, you said at the end that tomorrow you had another story. Well buddy hate to tell you but tomorrow came and went and still no story lol...WTF???

Jamie . . . you asked for it . . .
https://puas.forumotion.com/angel-eyes-f65/the-anti-friend-zone-t2864.htm#12304
lol

And yes, that would be the equivalent, pretty much. Or even a straight up wing.